Churches Urged to Embrace Single Christians in Congregational Life
In a bid to foster inclusivity, churches are being encouraged to better integrate and value single Christians within their communities. This call to action was a central theme at the first-ever Single Friendly Church Network conference.
The event, named ‘Belonging’, kicked off Single Friendly Church Week, aiming to inspire a cultural shift within churches to ensure all individuals, regardless of their relationship status, feel appreciated and included.
Sorcha Connell, the executive director of the Single Friendly Church Network, highlighted the often-overlooked challenges faced by single Christians. She emphasized that the issue is more relational than doctrinal, warning against equating Christian maturity with reaching expected relationship milestones.
Connell remarked, “When we treat faith like a ladder we start believing that whoever is climbing fastest, whoever is hitting the expected milestones, is doing it right and whoever isn’t must be doing it wrong.” She added, “The church was never meant to be a ladder, it was meant to be a table, wide enough and low enough for everyone in the room to feel included, to feel like they belong.”
The diversity of singleness was underscored, encompassing individuals who are never married, divorced, widowed, single parents, those dating, and Christians with non-believing spouses. According to the Office for National Statistics, approximately 8.6 million people in the UK live alone.
A 2012 Christian Connection survey revealed that 43% of over 3,000 single Christians felt their churches didn’t know how to cater to them. Recent research conducted by the Single Friendly Church Network in 2026 further highlighted the significance of friendship, with over 95% of respondents valuing Christian friendships highly.
Connell noted that many churches focus heavily on family-oriented activities, often overlooking the needs of single individuals. Celebrations often center on family milestones such as Mother’s and Father’s Day, weddings, and births, potentially alienating those experiencing these events alone.
Connell cited research showing over half of surveyed singles might skip attending their church on Christmas Day due to its strong association with family, preferring carol services during Advent instead. She stressed the need for church leaders to consider how single people feel within their communities.
Connell shared that her team’s church engagement manager’s “Jesus was Single” T-shirt often sparks reflection and dialogue. “We often subconsciously think ‘single’ means ‘alone’,” she noted, emphasizing that Jesus’ life exemplifies completeness without marriage.
The Single Friendly Church Network, established as a charity in 2023, aims to shift church culture to welcome singles throughout their lives. Jackie Elton, the network’s founder, shared her journey toward realizing this vision, initially believing online dating could solve singleness but later recognizing the need for broader community solutions.
Elton observed that traditional singles ministries often reinforced the notion of marriage as a primary goal, led predominantly by married individuals. Her experience with Christian Connection, a dating website launched in 2000, challenged these assumptions as users sought community and dialogue about their church experiences.
A significant survey of single Christians revealed that 42% felt invisible within their church communities, prompting calls for cultural change rather than more singles programs.
Rev Kate Wharton, another trustee of the Single Friendly Church, emphasized that single-friendly churches could enhance community and mission. She warned against the inadvertent prioritization of marriage and family in church structures, advocating for a focus on Christ-centered community.
Wharton suggested that churches should celebrate milestones significant to single people, such as new jobs or personal achievements, countering the cultural narrative that ties success to family milestones.
She concluded that singleness offers churches an opportunity to redefine community belonging in Christ, stating, “If we can become that kind of church, for people who arrive on their own we might discover that we are becoming much more like the church Jesus always intended for everyone.”
This article was originally written by www.christiantoday.com
